We’re coming home

I am heartbroken as I write this from the Chiang Mai International Airport. Early Monday morning we received news that we were going home. It is difficult to find words to express how I am feeling. One of my teammates said, “It feels like I’m going through a breakup with the World Race,” which is the best description I’ve heard to describe the ups and downs of the emotions we are feeling.

I ugly cried last night as I told my Mom and sister, “I don’t want to come home.” I chose this year on the race to abandon everything for God, and now, at the beginning of month 3, I have to surrender my race. It just doesn’t make sense, but I keep reminding myself that it doesn’t have to. My God is sovereign-He doesn’t do anything without purpose. 

In A Grief Observed, C.S. Lewis writes, “God has not been trying an experiment on my faith or love in order to find out their quality. He knew it already. It was I who didn’t. In this trial He makes us occupy the dock, the witness box, and the bench all at once. He always knew that my temple was a house of cards. His only way of making me realize the fact was to knock it down.”

Through the changes, uncertainty, and confusion, our faith is tested. When circumstances change, is He still your God? When He changes your plans, do you still trust Him? When nothing makes sense, do you look at yourself to figure it out, or do you look up?

My brothers and sisters, consider it nothing but joy when you fall into all sorts of trials, because you know that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect effect, so that you will be perfect and complete, not deficient in anything. But if anyone is deficient in wisdom, he should ask God, who gives to all generously and without reprimand, and it will be given to him. James 1:2-6

I don’t know if we will get to go back on the field. I don’t know what next week will look like. But I don’t know where I can find everything I need. I will feel what I need to feel, cry when I need to cry, but I will also praise and worship my Lord, seek His will, and look to His word. 

I am still processing, so the best way you can support me right now is through prayer. When I arrive home, I know I have a community to worship with, pray with, and process with, as we all navigate this new world in which we live. My focus will be on the Lord and what He wants me to do each day to help others. I may be leaving Asia, but His work doesn’t stop here. Maybe He’s bringing us back because we’re needed at home right now more than we’re needed here. 

The 3 short days we spent in Chiang Mai were filled with adventure, joy, and laughter. Our hosts said, “You won’t even have time to be sad, we have the whole day planned for you.”

Our first night our hosts drove us to a ranch where we watched a documentary on the Free Burma Ranges. It comes out in the United States in a few months and I want to share it with EVERYONE. For now, you can read about their mission here: https://www.freeburmarangers.org/

.  .  

We at SO WELL here! I was able to try gluten free pad thai and pineapple fried rice.

.    .    

We went to a few night markets, bartered for some souvenirs, and went to the fish spa (I was not a fan). 

.    

We fed elephants-Eek! And rode in a tuk tuk.

. 

But my favorite thing about our time was our sweet hosts. They welcomed us with open arms and shared so much love. Their 6 kids brought us abundant joy. In such a short time, they shared as much as they could about what God is doing in Thailand and the many ministry opportunities. 

Goodbye for now, Thailand. I will see you again some day.