During a very difficult breakup, I found myself broken and hurt like never before. It was during this time that I met God in an incredibly deep way. I grew up in and out of church and always considered myself a Christian, but didn't actually live it. God used a situation I never should have put myself in to redeem me. That's what He does-uses our weaknesses to show us that we are only strong with Him. He made me new. I've never experienced joy and peace through a trial quite like that. I've always wanted control because I felt that would give me security, but I discovered that I find the most peace and joy when I give control over to the Lord. 

The Good Lord showed me that it was time to lay down my burdens and follow Him. A few months ago I listened to a Christian Podcast called "Becoming Something." The episode was about singleness and what to do with this time in life. JP said, "If Jesus is real, if the bible is real, what would you do with your life? Pause this podcast, make a list, and in the next few months, go do those things." I made a list and number 6 was, "Go on a mission trip." I had not idea at the time what was in store for me. 

I had pictured my life at 28 to look very different than this. I have a beautiful life, it just wasn't the plan I had for myself. For the first time, I'm really letting God show me HIS plan. Mine is nothing in comparison to His. And right now, His plan is for me to join a group of strangers in 11 different countries over the course of 11 months. 

That sounds so crazy. I'm going to be sleeping in a tent, wearing the same clothes over and over again, and carrying all that I have on my back. The shy little girl that wouldn't even call to order a pizza at 18 (Mom had to do it) is now preparing to leave for a year. I've put God in a box so many times and because of that I've put myself in a box. I was too shy, too dependent, too inexperienced for Him to use my. Boy is he showing me that I was wrong. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1yBzIt_z8oY

I don't know why He chose me. I don't know exactly how He'll use me, but I'm trusting the He'll show me. I will be His salt and His light. God doesn't call the equipped, He equips the called.

Matthew 5:13-16 KJV

¹³ Ye are the salt of the earth: but if the salt have lost his savour, wherewith shall it be salted? it is thenceforth good for nothing, but to be cast out, and to be trodden under foot of men.

¹⁴ Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid.

¹⁵ Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house.

¹⁶ Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.